The State of the Union

AP source: Obama picks Carney for press secretary

Related articles

• A New Face at the White House (themoderatevoice.com)
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This Is A Test: Part II

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Canton, South Dakota Apology
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog Video Archive

This Is A Test

• Barbara Flatt is an Endangered Person.
• Woonsocket, located about 30 miles north of Mitchell, South Dakota, began in 1883 at the junction of the Chicago, Milwaukee and St. Paul Railroads. The town is best known for its hunting, its watermelons and its beautiful Lake Prior.
• Kuchen, Kuchen, Kuchen
• Looks like Matt Michels got that full-time job after all.
• Lance Russell's probably gonna get a wrist slappin'.
• South Dakota can be "that shining city on the hill." What?
•  Dan Nelson's a fraud. A crooked used car salesman? Imagine that.
• South Dakota, South Dakota, South Dakota, South Dakota, South Dakota.
• Pierre is a masculine given name. It is a French form of the name Peter^[1] (it can also be a surname and a place name). Pierre originally means "rock" or "stone" in French (derived from the Greek word "petros" meaning "stone, rock", via Latin "petra")

Related articles

• Longwood snaps South Dakota win streak 85-82 (seattletimes.nwsource.com)
• Rural South Dakota hospitals get technology grants (seattletimes.nwsource.com)
• "South Dakota Defeats Medical Pot Again" and related posts (thecrimereport.org)
• South Dakota defeats Eastern Washington 78-72 (seattletimes.nwsource.com)

Damned Ratbirds

Holy Shit the Ravens got Heather too!

Read All About It!!

 

"NFL To Fine James Harrison For Ravens Hit On Heath Miller".......developing story

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• Steelers Vs. Ravens Sunday Night Football: Heath Miller Concussed (bleacherreport.com)
• Heath Miller, Flozell Adams knocked out for Steelers (profootballtalk.nbcsports.com)
• In Bizarre Ruling, James Harrison Not Fined For Decapitation Of Joe Flacco (kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com)
• Pittsburgh Steelers' Heather Miller sustains concussion on hit to head (sports.espn.go.com)

The Country Gets a Little Eastier

The Big East Conference announced today that Texas Christian University has accepted an invitation to join the conference and begin competing, athletically, in the 2012-13 academic year.

As far as the Pitt Panthers are concerned, adding the Horned Frogs in football will do nothing to ensure The Wanstache's employment past 2015, as they are a legitimate BCS Bowl team (the "adult table" that Dave's Panther's can't seem to get a seat at) and should have no problem adding "L"'s to the Pitt stat sheet.

For the basketball team,as it says here, the move only gives DePaul company in the Big East basement.

But geographically speaking, how 'bout some truth in advertising? Reminds me of a riddle that went something like this: How far can a dog walk in to a forest?*


Just sayin'.

*HALFWAY.  After that, he's walking out of the forest.

Related articles

• Texas Is The New East Coast (withleather.uproxx.com)
• Report: TCU accepts offer to join Big East Conference (sportingnews.com)
• Big East To Add Some Texas Beef To Plate (blogs.forbes.com)
• University Confirms TCU's Intent To Join Big East (sbnation.com)
• Boise State Football: TCU's Big East Move Leaves the Broncos in the Dust (bleacherreport.com)
• Big East Snags a Big One: TCU Accepts Offer To Join Conference for All Sports (bleacherreport.com)

To You and Yours

Let me be the first.

Pass The Sangria

From Wikipedia:

The Sun is the star at the center of the Solar System. It has a diameter of about 1,392,000 km, about 109 times that of Earth, and its mass (about 2 × 10³⁰ kilograms, 330,000 times that of Earth) accounts for about 99.86% of the total mass of the Solar System.^[10] About three quarters of the Sun's mass consists of hydrogen, while the rest is mostly helium. Less than 2% consists of heavier elements, including oxygen, carbon, neon, iron, and others.^[11]

Also from Wikipedia:

Grandiose delusions or delusions of grandeur are principally a subtype of delusional disorder but could possibly feature as a symptom of schizophrenia and manic episodes of bipolar disorder.^[1] Grandiose delusions are characterized by fantastical beliefs that one is famous, omnipotent, or otherwise very powerful. The delusions are generally fantastic, often with a supernatural, science-fictional, or religious bent (for example, belief that one is an incarnation of Jesus Christ).

It is indeed no secret that I disagree  with most of policies of the Redistributor-in-Chief.  Nothing against you if you bought the bill of goods he was selling during his election, but I still think his whole candidacy was so much smoke and mirrors. (This is not to say, however, that the other side is necessarily any better. If recent history has shown anything, it's that until this country has a viable third party, we will keep getting what we've always got no matter whether there's a -D or -R following the politicians name. But that's a rant for another time.)

Unfortunately, while the POTUS was busy bailing out banks and buying automakers to rebound the economy, he and his cabal (Wikipedia again) missed the most obvious and perpetual economic recovery (read revenue generator) in the universe. And, lo and behold, a 49 year old Spanish woman has capitalized on their oversight..... 

Spanish Woman Claims She Owns the Sun

Angeles Duran, 49, told the online edition of daily El Mundo she took the step in September after reading about an American man who had registered himself as the owner of the moon and most planets in our solar system.

Before you start scoffing and poo-pooing Angeles' idea, listen to her plan (of course she has a thought out plan.)

Duran, who lives in the town of Salvaterra do Mino, said she now wants to slap a fee on everyone who uses the sun and give half of the proceeds to the Spanish government and 20 percent to the nation's pension fund.

She would dedicate another 10 percent to research, another 10 percent to ending world hunger -- and would keep the remaining 10 percent herself.

Bailing out the government, bailing out the pension fund (hear that Mayor Lukey?), helping research and ending world hunger for a mere 10% finder's fee? SCOOOOOOOORE!

Too bad the Dems couldn't find her in '08.

Related articles

• Our solar system's not so unique (holykaw.alltop.com)
• A solar system like ours, packed with planets, 127 light years away [Space Porn] (io9.com)

Happy Thanksgiving To All

Tomayto, Tomahto

Via Mondesi's House: No wonder I refuse to watch that show.

Thinkin' Bout Ya...

Now For A Word From Our Sponsors...

Can someone tell me why these two hilarious commercials are played only on late night cable?





Childish? Maybe. Immature? Probably. Funny as hell? Definitely.

But...

If we give up sophomoric humor, don't the terrorists win?

Just sayin'.

Ancient Mariner Indeed

What she thinks...

The weather started getting rough, The tiny ship was tossed, If not for the courage of the fearless crew The Minnow would be lost, The Minnow would be lost.

Without the spin...

RIP Greg Giraldo

From TMZ.com:

Greg had been hospitalized in New Brunswick, NJ after he overdosed on prescription pills last weekend. A source said the overdose was not a suicide attempt.

One of the funniest men around. The Comedy Central Roasts will never be the same.

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• Greg Giraldo Dead at 44 (VIDEO) (blippitt.com)
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Oh Man! Norma Rae like a Mofo, huh?

Buy Union! Vote Union!

From the Sacramento Bee...

Medical marijuana growers join Teamsters union

Their newly negotiated two-year contract provides them with a pension, paid vacation and health insurance. Their current wages of $18 per hour will increase to $25.75 an hour within 15 months, according to the union.

First the users, now the growers. Go Teamsters!

As the Teamsters go, so go the Dems.

Fightin' tea with pot. Nice.

About 100 workers in Oakland's retail medical marijuana dispensaries joined the United Food and Commercial Workers in May. The Teamsters have never tried to organize dispensary workers, because retail has never been an industry in which they have been traditionally involved, Marchetti said.

Kinda like how the Corleones respect the Tattaglia's turf.

Oh yeah, the punchline....

"The Teamsters would never organize an illegal business," Marchetti said.

A Cautionary Tale

The year is 1934.

New Jersey tailor Jacob Maged charges 35 cents to press a man's suit, even though FDR's "Brains Trust" figures the rate should be 40 cents.

Maged trifled by his 5-cent violation of New Jersey's "tailors' code," written in conjunction with the NRA. On April 20, 1934, he was fined $100 -- serious money when the average family income was about $1,500 -- and sentenced to 30 days in jail. The New York Times reported that Maged "was only vaguely aware of the existence of a code." Not that such ignorance was forgivable. It is every citizen's duty to stay up late at night, if necessary, reading the fine print about the government's multiplying mandates.

The guv-ment knows best.

Read the story by George F. Will here

Four More Years! Four More Years! Four More...

From today's PG...

A President named Goodluck? That's amazing.

The Amazing Jonathan (part 2) - Watch more Funny Videos

Never Forget

Well, That Explains It

I'm not a real big book reader, must be 'cause of that short attention...(what was I saying?) Oh yeah, Dinesh D'Souza has an article on Forbes.com previewing his book about how President Savior thinks. Here's a taste:

It may seem incredible to suggest that the anticolonial ideology of Barack Obama Sr. is espoused by his son, the President of the United States. That is what I am saying. From a very young age and through his formative years, Obama learned to see America as a force for global domination and destruction. He came to view America's military as an instrument of neocolonial occupation. He adopted his father's position that capitalism and free markets are code words for economic plunder. Obama grew to perceive the rich as an oppressive class, a kind of neocolonial power within America. In his worldview, profits are a measure of how effectively you have ripped off the rest of society, and America's power in the world is a measure of how selfishly it consumes the globe's resources and how ruthlessly it bullies and dominates the rest of the planet.

Looks like I gotta buy a bookshelf now.

Long but interesting article. Read it here.

Packin' It In

The boxes reportedly contained balls, bats, gloves, and hope for the future .

Said one player, "Hell, this stuff's  been layin' 'round the clubhouse all season. We're glad to get rid of it!"

So, I Was Wonderin...

• ...is it actually a better idea to take your chances on the roads of Pittsburgh after closing time than it is to try to walk home? And yes, Mr. Thomas W. Brown, unless they're teaching alcoholic arrogance and self-entitlement at Carlynton these days, connecting these two events is nothing but irresponsible sensationalism.
• ...where is it cooler to party these days? Da Strip or the Sahside?
• ...is anyone who thought #7 had a shot at a reduction to 3 games reeeaaally  that much more out of touch with reality than those who thought he'd get a 6 game suspension?
• ...can you say WTF? From the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit:
  
  
  

  you do not have any reasonable expectation of privacy in your own driveway — and no reasonable expectation that the government isn't tracking your movements.

• ...what can be better than this for your Labor Day entertaining? (h/t Bluzdude)

Burgers, Dogs, Bacon, Cheese. The 4 Basic Food Groups. Covered

Happy Holiday!?

According to the Americans for Tax Reform Foundation and the Center for Fiscal Accountability, August 19th was Cost of Government Day.

In 2010, Cost of Government Day falls on August 19. That means working people must toil 231 days out of the year just to meet all costs imposed by government. In other words, the cost of government consumes 63.41 percent of national income.

“Two years ago Americans worked until July 16 to pay for the cost of government: all federal, state and local government spending and regulatory costs.  That government was too expensive and wasteful.  Two years later, we work until August 19 for the same bloated government.  We have lost an additional full month of our income to pay the cost of government in just the last two years,” said Grover Norquist, president of Americans for Tax Reform.

At this rate, Cost of Government Day will fall after Labor Day in no time.

Time it right and it could be a 5 day weekend.

Party On!!

Finally!

With all the talk these days about racism and reverse racism, racists and reverse racists, and all sorts of reverse refudiation (amen, Chad)- FINALLY, the answer to the question....

"Are you a Racist? "

Ahh.. sweet sweet closure.

July 8, 2010- JACKPOT!!!

• 2 Words- Table Games. HIP, HIP, HOORAY!! First of all, when is the great Commonwealth going to learn to get something done all at once, rather than in a half-assed piecemeal fashion? I mean, is there a single person who thought that our casinos could survive on slots alone? How about, just once, Pennsylvania leads the way instead of waiting for other states to show the way. Next, what's with Rivers and Meadows being packed at 6AM? Didn't anyone have a job to go to? I guess unemployment is why they were all jackpot hunting. Finally- does anyone find it a little fishy that the state lottery system went down for a half-a-day? Just wonderin'.
• Biggest Winner-O-the-Day (Local Division)- Michael Lanese. With the luck Ol' Mike had today, it's a too bad he wasn't at the casino. Long story short- Mike leaves his 9 year-old twins to clean guns, and lo and behold, one ends up shooting the other in the head. Then, father-of-the-year runs away to Vietnam to escape prosecution. Luckily, he landed in the courtroom of Judge Jill ""The damage here is done and it's not repairable." Rangos, who sentenced Mikey to time served. The really interesting piece will be if this 49 year-old grandmother from Homewood draws the good Judge Rangos for her trial. All the classic matchups here- man v. woman, Mt Lebanon v. Homewood, etc.  September 18 - October 18 2008 clearly not a good month for kids in Pittsburgh.
• Biggest Jackpot Loser-O-the-Day (Universe Division)- All of Us. LeBron James to Miami. Please (insert deity of choice here)- let there be more than five more years of this droning. Pleeeease.

www.bushfans.com

Think About It....

Have you ever seen them together?

Just sayin'.

Sen. Robert Byrd, D-WV (1917-2010)

From Wikipedia:

According to Byrd, a Klan official told him, "You have a talent for leadership, Bob... The country needs young men like you in the leadership of the nation." Byrd later recalled, "suddenly lights flashed in my mind! Someone important had recognized my abilities! I was only 23 or 24 years old, and the thought of a political career had never really hit me. But strike me that night, it did."[8] Byrd held the titles Kleagle (recruiter) and Exalted Cyclops.[8]

From The Daily Caller:

Deceased U.S. Sen. Robert Byrd will be remembered by lots of things: His love for dogs and hyperbole, his ability to funnel federal dollars into make-work jobs in his native West Virginia, his loathing of balanced budgets and the fact that he skillfully conned several generations of Appalachian woodhicks into voting for him, over and over again, for almost six decades.

From Smash Mouth Politics:

“We don’t need to speak ill of the dead, but if we are honest, we must acknowledge there is little if anything to be proud of in Senator Byrd’s long senate legacy. To his credit, however, he never killed a campaign worker while driving drunk over a bridge or joined another senator in making a waitress sandwich. His personal and family life seem to have been relatively decent for a Democrat senator.”

From Walmart.com :

To the Specialist 8)

Let's Go Pens, Let's Go Pens, Let's Go Pens

Finally, the madness is over......  Pirates put pierogi back in the race

"The employee has been rehired because he was not terminated in accordance with company [human resources] procedures," Brian Warecki, the team's communications director, said in an e-mail Tuesday night. "While his conduct was in violation of our company policy (and many other companies), it was not subject to termination at this time."

It's good to see that being so bold as to state the blatantly  obvious in public is not subject to termination "at this time".

Mr. Kurtz, 24, who was in his second year as one of the team's mascots, was dismissed Thursday evening, hours after posting a message on his Facebook page that said the contract extensions the Pirates gave to general manager Neal Huntington and manager John Russell would mean another losing season.

He said he apologized to Dan Millar, the team's mascot coordinator, but he was still fired from the $25-a-night job.

Just a question- how many mascots is enough? Could the answer be... "WHEN YOU HAVE SO MANY THAT YOU NEED TO EMPLOY AN EFFING MASCOT COORDINATOR ?!!!"

"When they (HR and Senior Management) were made aware of the improper termination on Friday evening, they conducted an investigation into the firing. Upon learning the facts of the case and determining that he should not have been fired, [management] contacted the employee Saturday morning to offer him his job back, and he accepted."

If there's one thing I've learned from my years of life experience, it's everything comes up sunny once HR gets involved.

Mr. Kurtz said the resulting publicity from his dismissal was "overwhelming," and that he didn't tell anyone that he'd been rehired because he wanted to leave that in the hands of the Pirates.

And, naturally, the Succos PR machine lets its mess continue to fester another halfa week. Any press is good press, ya know.

Unfortunately, reinstating  Kurtz means that  perhaps the only job Ross Ohlendorf could perform consistently is gone.

Ohlendorf retired Texas' first 10 batters, pounding his sinker under plenty of swings and misses. But the Rangers have come about their 42-28 record honestly, and they looked far more comfortable second time through the order and chased him with two outs in the fifth.

His line: Four runs, five hits and home runs by Michael Young and Julio Borbon.

His record: 0-6, winless in 15 starts since Aug. 18, 2009.

His ERA: 5.43.

Have no fear, though. Ohlendorf has a handle on it-

"It's frustrating," Ohlendorf said. "I need to pitch a lot better than I have been."

October 7th can't come soon enough.

There's an App for That

I wonder if they let him finish before they beat the crap out of him.

Let's Go Bucs! Lets Go Bucs!

Who says the Pirates front office doesn't know what they're doing?

After each race, the Pirates post on the scoreboard the "standings" numbering the wins recorded by each pierogi. According to Mr. Kurtz, the races are not, in fact, always fixed. 

"They try to keep it close," he said. "They don't want a pierogi to fall too far behind. So if Jalapeno Hannah is two, three games behind, they kind of want her to win, so they pick the fastest runner out of the four runners that are racing that night and give Hannah to that one."

Must be how they put together the rotation, too.

Random Randomosity

• Maybe the Islamists in Somalia aren't all bad:  Somali militants threaten World Cup TV viewers

"We are warning all the youth of Somalia not to dare watch these World Cup matches. It is a waste of money and time and they will not benefit anything or get any experience by watching mad men jumping up and down," he said.

Clearly that guy has never sat through a few hours at PNC Park 

• First they're not fit for the Stanley Cup, now...  Report: Most Philadelphians Not Fit For Military

A nonprofit group says that up to 90 percent of young Philadelphians are ineligible for military service because of criminal records, obesity or lack of education.

Put skates on 'em. They'd all fit right in with the Flyers

• At this point, don't you think an attorney is just a waste?  Van der Sloot attorney quits 

He is in a high-security area of the prison where only two of 10 cells are occupied, and he has no contact with inmates in the general prison population.

He is under guard 24 hours a day, authorities said.

The only other inmate in the area is alleged Colombian hit man Hugo Trujillo Ospina. The two have spent some time together in a common area where there is a television set and weights made of out of broomsticks and soda bottles, authorities said.

It occurs to me- Joran Van der Sloot: cold blooded killer or just really bad date?

• Hey McDonalds... Chocolate. Milk. Shake. Had I wanted whipped cream and a cherry, I'm almost  sure I would have ordered a Mc-Effing- sundae.

****************************************************************************
Just for fun... captions for the photo anyone?